Shared meaning, in essence, is the culmination of what’s important to a couple and the purpose they share.

When I think about shared meaning, I think about those existential questions.

Who are we? What do we want for ourselves and our family? What is our purpose in life? … as a child, a spouse, a parent, a friend? … What legacy do we want to leave behind in this world?

Dr. John Gottman suggests that couples create shared meaning through the use of rituals, roles, goals, and symbols.

In fact, creating shared meaning is the highest level of Dr. Gottman’s Sound Relationship House.

His research on which this model was built, encompasses how to move through the levels of a healthy relationship.

This top level is how couples intentionally create a sense of purpose together. Shared meaning boils down to a combination of the stories you silently tell… by the map of your life, your culture, and your beliefs.

Sit down and discuss with your partner how these ideals shape your life and how you want your life shaped by these ideals.