Day 7 – Being Attentive

30-Day Couples Challenge

“Failed bids for connection are often the result of mindlessness, not of malice.”


Show Video Transcript

Dr. Gottman stated that Bids are the fundamental unit of emotional communication.

The important thing is how couples pay attention to each other, no matter what they’re talking about or what they’re doing.

Simply put, this means that partners are attentive. They are in tune with their significant other. They listen and can determine what of their own, can be put on hold for a moment, to focus on another.

Your task for today is to think of one thing that keeps you from being attentive to your partner. It may be Facebook, videogames, texting, television, work, or even your own short comings with setting boundaries.

What kinds of routines or habits limit your experience of everyday life and your relationship with your partner? Focus on how you can manage those today. And as a result, what do you notice?

Journal about it!

Click to watch the video and download this PDF to access your task for the day.

For more ways to turn towards your partner, give our office a call at 330-673-5812 to get set up with one of our skilled couples clinicians!